That which occurs has such an advantage over our intentions that we never recover and never experience it as it really appeared.
- Rainer Maria Rilke
I
forest shaped like an ark
keel running through cloud
everything upside down in the brain
as it ought to be
translations of Neruda
the heart of the world its scent
pulling us out
of ourselves for once
the smell of firewood feathers
warship moving out to sea
parabola & arc
wake of the boat through English Bay
another line the eye can watch
disappear
II
burning in with acid the scars show
breathing nitric
windows into whatever
we don’t or can’t know
barry says bless you
& means it
stretching maps their lines
everywhere
hungry
confused
as the fragile heart
delicate dna
strands tightening
the grip
III
tattoo of ink bone black
zinc paper skin
absorb the light
disclose desire
disentangle
the knots of being
in song in laughter
in visible ink, their names
indelibly there
in layers of flower & rock
in brush strokes lightning
through the brain
curled up against
edge of dark
IV
night itself, the moon
crazy men & women
the heart an empty thing photographs
old acids & chemicals
remembered hands & grace
of gesture
swimming the lake solo
(as if a loon
could take its tune
from you & from you
we move
grief being
a thing
outside us
V
east into darkness
pink copper wings
frozen earth
city in ice
ash & bone-blue
speech of trees
maple oak beech birch
breathing light
through eyes, throat
frozen
knowing she is there
that garden
of sex & the sacred
fragment & doubt
VI
what did we speak when we spoke
figmental
phantoms leopards shooting stars
as if rest or dream were
possible imaginary
hand
grief & echo
the tones of you
taking us to
some knowledge of love
we did not know
we could be moved to
(comet in sky
square inch of earth
VII
speech & silence, the tongue
almost cut out
the privilege of speech & its mutations
thumbless hand
eye clouded with cataract
leg pins & crutch --
the obsession still
the shapeliness of
the day --
pink cherry blossoms
white magnolia,
one glimpse of the green
world outside
the window
VIII
what comes comes whole to the hand
though the hand itself is broken
& winter light, lilac snow
falls on the lake
on the mountain --
you have been here
not just to practise the heart
nor just to show
how these things are done
as you slowly
fold into
yourself
the mountain, the snow, the light,
the lake in the heart, the laughter
IX
silence and then silence as if
these things (mountain, lake, snow
were not given to you
as if these things (magnolia, cherry, birch
would not remember you
or keep you next
to their skin
as if the children & their children
had nothing better
to do than forget you
in these rooms where (you
would walk) & we
thought you
thought you